Might Go

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The other day, I was thinking about the car I had in my freshman year of college. It was a bright orange MG Midget (stick shift) that my dad purchased for me in the San Fernando Valley on Ventura Blvd., CA. I thought I was so cool driving that car to CSUN with the top down. A car has the power to make your heart burst with pride when you are an image-conscious teen.

Fast forward a year, and I wasn’t quite so cool. At least once a month, I was at the mechanic's office dealing with car problems. Once, I drove out of the shop and had no brakes (OOPS, he didn’t reconnect something). Another time, I turned the wheel, and the back tire fell off because the mechanic neglected to tighten the bolts. The car stalled at traffic lights, and altitudes of any kind made it sound like it was falling apart. My car became the bane of my existence, but it was still so cute. One day at school, a fellow student asked me if the little orange MG was mine. Yes, I replied, thinking I was such hot stuff. He told me he also had an MGB in the shop right then. I commiserated that mine, too, was in the shop a lot. He looked at me seriously and said, “Well, you know what MG stands for, don’t you?” I stared back blankly, thinking I knew it was British, but that’s all. He laughed, saying, “Yours is Might Go, and mine is Might Go Backwards.” Then, off he walked, and I could only think he had nailed it.

Car acronyms, at least for the cars I have owned, have a ring of truth. I have to list a few, and I do so very tongue-in-cheek because I also owned a Ford Mustang (Found On Road Dead), a Saturn (Sounds Absolutely Terrible, Unbelievable Rattling Noises), a Toyota (Too Often Yankees Overprice This Auto), a Chevy Astro Van that seated 8 (Cheapest Heap Ever Visioned Yet), a Mazda MPV (Most Always Zipping Dangerously along), and a BMW (Big Money Waste), or as my husband would say (Beautiful Masterpiece on Wheels).

A few of the other acronyms that made me laugh out loud were:

• GMC – Get More Chicks
• HONDA – Hang On, Not Done Accelerating
• FIAT – Found In A Trench
• SAAB – Send Another Automobile Back
• PINTO – Put In Nickel To Operate
• OLDSMOBILE – Old Ladies Drive Slow – Mostly Over Bridges Into Lake Erie
• PORSCHE – Pulled Over Regularly So Cops Have Enough

The funny sayings go on and on, and most have a ring of truth. For now, Jeff drives a Prius, and I drive a Rav4, which we plug in at home and work. Somewhere along the line, we traded cool for practical and expensive for thrifty. I still feel a thrill when I plug in the car, though. I’m just waiting for the day someone asks what Rav4 stands for. I’ll have to quickly walk off because it won’t be a Recreational Active Vehicle with 4WD.

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